I am now almost 3 months out from chemo and it’s been almost a month since my last radiation treatment, and I must say that I feel great!

I didn’t really think that Radiation had really effected my overall energy level like I was told it would, but now that I am several weeks away from it (about the time they said that it would take to start “recovering” from radiation) I am really starting to feel a difference. It’s a subtle shift that’s hard to describe, but it makes a big difference.

When I was undergoing treatment (both chemo and I guess radiation to a certain extent) , I got the point where “normal” or “feeling good” apparently meant that I was able to make it through the day without really noticing any side effects, or maybe just being a little tired. In short I was able to summon the energy to do what was necessary, and to me that felt normal. But lately, like in the last week or so, I’ve noticed a shift in myself both physically and mentally. I find that I have extra energy and I’ve been taking the initiative lately. It’s little things like cleaning the house, or starting a project that I’ve meant to do. The shift from getting and doing things because I knew that I should, and now being at the point that I kind of actually want to get out and do things. Running errands, and generally feeling productive throughout the day. I’m struggling here to describe this spark that I feel again. That I was missing, and that I didn’t even realize that I was missing.

It’s like when your ears suddenly pop, when you didn’t even realize that your ears were under pressure. Or when you blow your nose and you can suddenly breathe again, only you never really noticed that were becoming stuffed up in the first place since it was such a gradual build-up. I don’t know if those examples are useful to anyone else, but, I’m starting to kind of feel a little like that. Only all over!

I suddenly have energy to spare. Energy that I didn’t even realize I was lacking. Energy to spare, and I find myself looking for ways to put it to use.

I finished chemo 3 months ago, and I finished radiation a month ago. It almost seems too crazy to be true, but it looks like my “recovery” is just starting. My doctors said that it would happen like this, that I would take a few months before I started to get my energy back. But as it turns out, I had been sick for so long that I think I had forgotten what healthy feels like.

And now, as it turns out, I’m just starting to find my energy again.