My friend Andy is a High School Drama teacher and for the last several years I’ve always been invited into his process during the final weeks of his shows leading up to opening. I’ve always enjoyed its something that I look forward to  every fall and spring. It’s been amazing to get to know the kids and watch them grow and learn throughout their High School Drama Careers (I still can’t over the fact that it’s been 10 years since I’ve had mine!) This year has been particularly special as he has now been at the same school for 4 years, so I’ve been watching and working with many of the seniors  since they were freshmen.

Their production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream opens next weekend and I sat through my third run through last night. After the run I got the chance to give notes while Andy was working elsewhere and afterward spent 20 minutes or so working a scene with a couple of the actors. Working with young actors I often find myself surprised at their sometimes enthusiastic and eager reactions to what are (to me) rather obvious and mundane suggestions. I guess there must be something to be said for that college education I went and got, and these years of experience that I have now, because some of these kids seem to think I’m a genius! At any rate, I had a blast last night and look forward to returning to their rehearsals for the next couple of days. Although it’s only been a little over a month, before today it felt like it had been FOREVER since I’d had my hands on a piece of theater.

I miss it. I miss working. I miss my co-workers in the theater community. I miss going to work every night. I just miss surrounding myself with a creative and collaborative process. The Theater is a unique and interesting “place” to work and I just simply miss being around it all of the time.

But yeah, I can’t tell you enough how great it feels to be useful again, even if it’s only for a few more days. This is what I do, I make theater. But unfortunately a career in the theater lends itself to being an all or nothing sort of thing. Unlike many other people out there battle cancer, I can’t take a few days off of work every other week for treatment. That’s not how my industry and chosen profession work. If you can’t commit to the 90+ show run then you’re not going to work. And unfortunately the advanced nature of auditioning and booking gigs a few months ahead of time means that I really can’t start audition again until I know for sure I’m done with chemo and I get my first test results back that indicate “No Evidence of Disease.”  I had to drop out of the show that I was supposed to be working on right now and I’m now basically on the Disabled List. Even worse, I’ve been declared “Out For the Season.” I may only be  slated for another 6 or so months of chemo, but I don’t anticipate working again until next fall at the earliest. It’s hard not to dote on that thought.*

We are seeing the first preview of the show I was supposed to be in right now on Sunday and I’m really curious as what it will be like watching a show that I was originally slated to be in. I’m expecting a pretty mixed bag of emotions. But above all, I think I’ll just be glad that I’m be back sitting in the office again for a few hours. It’s just a for a brief visit, but I’ll be back work full-time just as soon as I can.

I just miss it, that’s all.

*Please forgive me the use of the word “dote.” Like I said, I spent all afternoon in a  Shakespeare rehearsal. Earlier I used the word “churl” in a sentence. It was awkward.